Commitments to Yourself Versus Others

"Zoar Calendar," Fritz Boehmer, c. 1937
Courtesy of the National Gallery of Art Open Access Program

Hello friends,

I've noticed something about myself.  I'm great at keeping commitments to other people.  I have a calendar that I treat like it's sacred, and if something is in there, it's set in stone.  I'm punctual.  I clean up the common areas in my apartment that I know my roommates need to use or that other people will use when they come over.  I edit things when people ask me to, make visits to feed friends' cats when they ask me to, try to make a point of being there when a friend is having a party or wants to grab drinks, finding little slivers of time in my already busy schedule for them.

But I've also noticed something else.  I don't do this for myself.  I willingly sacrifice what little personal time I have between my obligations that I can't shirk (my two jobs, for instance), often giving up sleep to be able to get some time to myself after packing in several different obligations in one day.

And that time that I sacrifice is my creative time.  If I want to eventually turn my creative hobbies into a workable business, then shouldn't I be treating my crafting with the same commitment and seriousness that I treat my other jobs?  And my obligations to friends?

"Allegory of Magnanimity," Luca Giordano, c. 1670
Digital Image Courtesy of the Getty Open Content Program

I remember reading an article some time ago - and I wish I could remember exactly what article so I could credit it - advising that "highly productive people" (I use quotes to represent my skepticism of the entire concept of these angelic highly productive people who have somehow figured everything out) actually block out time in their calendars for the personal projects they want to get done, and treat them like any other set-in-stone commitment.

Likewise, I've read articles stating that "highly productive people" go to work early and then wait at least a few hours to check e-mails, preserving that early morning time for longer-term or more intensive projects that require undivided attention. This way they don't find themselves spending literally the entire day responding to other people's needs and questions via e-mail, or getting distracted and pulled away at every moment.

I have to admit, I haven't tried either tip, at least not yet.  I find myself psychologically resistant.  It makes perfect sense and I bet these tips are probably very effective for at least a portion of the population.  Maybe I need to force myself.  But that's just the problem. Tricks like that are great if you have the will to follow through on them.

While on the one-hand there's a certain self-sacrificial impulse to place commitments to others over my own long-term obligations, there's also a countervailing selfish impulse to say yes to myself when I want something right now, placing short term gratification ahead of long term priorities. For instance, when it comes to finances, my dad has always lectured me to "pay myself first," by which he means that the first thing I should do with every paycheck is put a certain amount into savings. Instead, I find myself much more inclined to go shopping.

Sometimes I know I should stay home and work on a particular craft.  I tell myself ahead of time that's what I'm going to do.  But then I get invited to go to drinks with a friend, or out to dinner, or to an area event.  And then I think to myself, it can't hurt right?  It's just one more night!  What's waiting one more night in the grand scheme of things?

German Easter Calendar Beginning with the Year 1466
Courtesy of the National Gallery of Art Open Access Program

Given the fact that I know I have this habit, am I really likely to uphold my commitments to myself just because I have written them into my calendar?  Maybe it's worth at least trying.

In any case, my goal in 2017 is to really hunker down and commit real time and energy - and even a small commitment is OK if it's a meaningful one - into my creative pursuits.  This blog is a large part of that, for sure.  I also plan to put more energy into my Etsy store and a number of other creative projects I've always talked about doing (more on these later).  I'm also going to seriously pursue teaching crafting classes as a serious means of monetizing my amassed creative knowledge.

How about you, friends?  Do you use a calendar and internal deadlines to keep yourself on track?  If not, how do you go about ensuring you uphold your commitments to yourself?

Emily